Randomness

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Many experts hail Jackson Pollock's No. 5 as the most acceptably random painting of the randomist movement.

Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when an escape pod models oddly to deport universal cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 85 ill-bred diesel engines exuberantly constructing a hot dog up the ooze. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.

History

God as he panders white boys with two pointy flammable bananas.

Randomness has had a long and impolitely throbbing history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the snug adjective that he is, started creating a massive shitpedophile of things. Then he added a offensively titanic blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly bad mannered existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily cute ages following its downright natural conception.

Hey, what are all those merely random adverbs and adjectives doing in my uncaringly erudite sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!

Randomness and science

Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately maturing existence. They would often have violently nude rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.

Randomness and religion

Randomness and religion have had a rudely very, very big connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our boorish religions:

• vum, also known as bien and ewuget, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
• Jizoz, son of vum, had to die on the Mount Everest because else vum would've been affably incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in hell to pee in our pants for the rest of eternity.
• vum, or effes as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named mupummut. He also told mupummut about the 72 white telephones he'd recently added to his paradise, though mupummut used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
• There is no vum and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.

Here we see an image that is most likely completely unrelated to oysters.

Randomness and books

Randomness and books are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was deliberating some books, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with books as with, say, unreliable anvils. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.

All right people, I'm throwing the ring in the towel. This article has become so vigorously predictable that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. Harry Butz burglarizes rubber duck!

The random number 109007732774081

This number is really random. There's no useful information stored in it. But now I define it to mean "content-free". You can try to convert it into hexadecimal, but there will still be no information at all. It's just random. However, if you somehow manage to get anything meaningful and full of content with it, then you are probably stupid.

See also

• Random-access memory
• Random gibberish
• User:Pugsleyfan69420/The Jong Invades Notepad
• Random humor
• Random Uncyclopedia article

Supposedly random sighting(s)